How to Talk So People Actually Listen
Seven Deadly Sins of Communication – These are things we need to avoid according to Julian.
1. Gossip – Speaking ill of someone who’s not present.
2. Judging – Placing yourself in comparison to another.
3. Negativity – Being pessamistic about everything.
4. Complaining – Not solving problems, only bringing them up.
5. Excuses – Not connecting to reality
6. Exaggeration – This often leads to lying
7. Dogmatism – Confusion of facts with opinions
Four really powerful cornerstones if we want our speech to be powerful and to make change in the world. HAIL is the acronym that’s formed. They all need to be used at the same time to have them work most effectively.
Honesty – Be true in what you say.
Authenticity – Standing in your own truth.
Integrity – Actually doing what you say.
Love – Wishing people well.
You can locate your voice, speaking through your throat vs your nose. Lower voice commands more power and makes people pay attention to you more.
Timbre – Rich, smooth, warm preferred. You can train to get this better, with posture, exercise
Prosody – Root of meaning in conversation. The opposite of being monotone
Pace – Fast or slow
Silence – Creates emphasis
Pitch – Self explanatory
Volume – Self explanatory
To get better at this. Warm up your voice. He gives six vocal exercises towards the end of the talk. In order to really understand, watch the video, but they basically are:
-Breath in and sigh out.
-Warm up lips. Bah, bah, bah.
-Second warm up lists. bbbbbb, bbbbb, bbbbbb.
-Tongue La La La La,
-Tongue roll Rrrrrr
-Weeeeee high pitch then to Awwwwww low.
Julian recommends doing each of these six exercises before giving a talk or presentation.